Stuck in the Middle and My Poopy Picasso

Thursday and Friday evening we drove around rounding up clothes for our upcoming arrival. We found some ads on Craig's List for baby girl's clothes and decided to check them out. You see, last summer we decided we weren't going to have any more babies- at least not for a few years- so we got rid of everything from clothes to toys, highchairs to car seats. Well, right before Christmas we got a little surprise. I decided I was not going to spend a ton of money on baby clothes this time because this WILL be our last child so I wanted to do second hand. Thursday evening we drove to one house and the stuff was........well........... nicely put- it was junk. Friday we drove to another house and hit the jack-pot. I ended up with 5 big boxes of clothes for $30! All were gently used or still had the tags on them. We stopped at the gas station on the way home to fill up and as the kids and I were sitting in the car while my husband pumped gas my son (3 years old) said (in the most pathetic voice) "This isn't fun anymore. " Assuming I had misunderstood I asked "What did you say, honey?" He repeated "This isn't fun anymore."
"What's not fun anymore?"
"All we do is drive around, drive around, getting clothes for baby Cali and she isn't even here- but I am here!"
(Hmmmmmmmm. Where is this going? Tread lightly Mommy.) "Oh. Well, would it be more fun if we were driving around to get clothes for you?"
"Umm, yeah!"
"Well sweetheart, you have a lot of clothes but when you get bigger we will buy you more clothes."
"But I don't want to get bigger!"
"You don't want to get bigger?"
"No. I just want to be Kyle."
"Well honey, we all get bigger. Mommy and Daddy used to be little and we got bigger. Bella used to be little and she has gotten bigger. It's good to get bigger- that means you are healthy!"
"But I just want to be your little boy."
"You know, buddy- no matter how big you get you will always be mommy's little man. Always."
Daddy gets back in the car....
Kyle: "Cool! Chips!" Conversation over.
I sat there on the way home in a daze. I could not get his words out of my head. How awful! I keep thinking of how hard it is for me to watch my kids growing so fast- getting big right before my eyes and it is heartbreaking. He will be 4 in July and it does not seem possible! Where did all of that time go? But you know, I never once thought about how it effects him/them. He is stuck at this age between being a baby and being a big boy. He has been learning and absorbing like a sponge. Every new song he hears he has memorized in no time. Within the last few months he has learned how to recognize, sound out and write all of his letters, most of his numbers, tell time, he has been potty training, riding his bike, cleaning his own room, etc. Maybe he is doing too many "big boy" things too fast????? Maybe I see him and how much he has matured and therefore treat him like he is older. I need to step back and remember sometimes that he is only 3. I do expect a lot out of him most of the time- I always have because he has always acted older and done things way before he should. Maybe we both need to step back and enjoy the stage he is in a little more and ease into that big boy phase to make it easier for all of us. I think he made me realize that as hard as it is for me to see how big he is and how much he is learning and maturing it is equally- or more- difficult for him to be getting bigger and more mature. But now that I know, I will be able to nurture that a little more so that he will be more accepting of change and excited about who he is becoming instead of feeling like he is "stuck" in the middle.

Just a warning: The following story is not for the weak of stomach.
My daughter hates clothes. She loves shoes and she loves loves loves handbags (wonder where she gets that) but she despises clothes. Well- wearing them anyways. She does fine when we are out in public but the second we walk in the door everything comes off but her diaper. Recently though- within the last couple of months- the diaper has become an issue as well. This is a very frustrating thing for me because I can not convince her to leave it on nor can I stand messes. Uh huh. During the day is never a problem. It is when she lays down for a nap or when she gets up in the morning you walk in to find her butt naked and bouncing around like she just won the jelly bean lottery- free of the garbs of man! My little nudist hippy. Some day I will find the crib and everything in it soaked with pee. Ugh. Pick her up, throw her in the tub, get her dressed, go strip the bed, clean the mattress (thank God it's plastic) and then remake the bed. This has become a part of my daily routine- sometimes twice a day! It's like she is a dog marking her territory. I have tried everything short of wrapping duct tape around the waistband of her diaper to cover up the little Velcro closures. And the only reason I haven't done that is A. I am afraid she would mess with it and get it stuck to her body or B. (OK- 2 reasons) She would probably figure out how to get out of it regardless. I carry the monitor around like I am the C.I.A. listening for any indication that she is awake so I can run in and bust her in the act or keep her from doing it altogether- no such luck thus far. She is sneaky! And really, really quiet! You walk in and find her soaked with pee, bouncing up and down and laughing! She doesn't care- why should I? Well, because it is disgusting. Not just cleaning up the mess but the fact that it's all over her. Yuck! But it gets better........... actually worse. Much worse. Today- once again, for like the 5th or 6th time now- she pooped in her crib. But she doesn't just take off her diaper and poo in one corner like a Guinea pig or a rabbit would in a cage. No, not my daughter. You walk in to see it everywhere- and by everywhere I mean everywhere. She plays in it, she flings it across the room and she finger paints the crib and the wall with it. My little Poopy Picasso. Now I have never had a weak stomach- there is pretty much nothing that grosses me out. But this........... this grosses me out beyond being grossed out. I seriously do not think this can be normal. In all the years I have babysat and done daycare I have NEVER had a child do this. To think that she is playing in it and...YUCK-IE!!! Bacterial hazard! Bio hazard for goodness sake! When I tell family or friends about her doing this they laugh. The first time she did it was when my husband was at work and I called him to tell him and he laughed. Well, that following Sunday when he went in to get her out of bed in the morning- guess what he walked into. Uh huh- Poopy Picasso. Apparently- by the reaction he gave and the look on his face- he must have thought I was kidding or even exaggerating. He learned. There are certain things that your children do that you can look back on afterwards and laugh. When they color on the walls or themselves, dump all of the dish soap on the carpet or stick a piece of corn up their nose, but this................... this is not funny. It wasn't funny the first time and it isn't funny today. I see it as a health risk. Did I mention she is 2 years old? Old enough to know better!!! So my question to you is- did your children ever do this and if so, how did you get them to stop? Or should I just chalk it up as another mommy drama or mommy right of passage? Yuck. Sorry for the icky post but this has seriously got me stumped. I am desperate.

Wishing you all clean spaces and pleasant smells,

~Heather :)